The Unguarded heart
How much does The Unguarded Heart cost
Money is a charged topic and so many of us struggle to invest in ourselves, I intentionally hold the "money" conversation for in person conversations so that I can meet you where exactly where you are.
In the future I aspire to structure my programs with tiers of participation. Such as Ixchel Lunar's fee structure for Wild Presence that they adapted from Bayo Akomolafe's model for his program, We Will Dance With Mountains: Into the Cracks.
When does the group meet?
We meet weekly on Sundays from 3 pm - 5 pm EST.
The monthly meetings are scheduled independently from our regular group meetings.
Is this group only for white, heteronormative cis gendered women?
No. Although I feel a responsibility to walk in integrity with my own privileged identities. A part of this responsibility includes being forthcoming about the limitations of my own experiences.
For now, I am focusing this group on cisgendered and AFAB people regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, which are highly sensitive and highly personal topics.
Also, while I have engaged in educating myself and participating in antiracist practices with organizations such as AWARE LA, I consider myself a beginner and a student.
If you walk with marginalized or historically oppressed identities, let's talk more so we can be sure to honestly evaluate whether this container will afford you the safety necessary to engage in deep personal work.
Do I have to share my story with anyone in the group.
No. Consent is foundational to this group. Participants will be given opportunity to share, but will never be required to share any personal work or insights in the group aside from general check-ins.
Is this a writing group? Do I need to be a writer to join?
No. Writing is just one tool of self-expression that we will use to learn more about ourselves, particularly in the monthly Sexual Memoir sessions. Clarifying our "memoir" does not require that we write the story down. Rather that we make meaning of our personal and ancestral stories, which often results in a reframing of the narrative.
We will utilize guided, simple and structured writing exercises as a vehicle for personal insight, alongside other mediums such as meditation and movement.
Consider this quote from Marion Woodman: "Unconsciousness needs the eye of the consciousness; consciousness needs the energy of the unconscious. Writing allows that interchange to take place."
What if I don't identify as a "leader"? Or worse yet, I've trained in modalities & am certified to teach or facilitate but I haven't done anything with my certification....
No problem. In my experience, many heart-centered, high integrity women do not consider themselves leaders. Sometimes, this is simply because they associate the word "leader" with patriarchal &/or hierarchical structures where leadership means participating in "power-over" dynamics.
My background as a mediator & the decade I spent immersed in cooperative work give me a strong practical (not solely theoretical) foundation for collaborative leadership, a place where we can fundamentally rework our understanding of leadership.
The Unguarded Heart is a practice ground for participants to discover, hone & step more deeply into their leadership, of themselves and of the group. This happens both through facilitating your own personal process, & by having opportunities to practice facilitating the group.
What if I don't want to talk about my history of sexual violence or related experiences?
No problem. In my experience leading groups for survivors, participants rarely addressed their experiences directly. Even so, there was a relief knowing that everyone in the room understood the deep, life altering impacts of being subjected to sexual violence.
Similarly, in this group, there will be mutual understanding that each individual is engaged in deeply personal healing work.
We will cultivate consent in communication founded on deep respect for the sacredness of each individual's personal process.
What if I have a known trauma history, what if I don't know if I have experienced trauma?
Both are welcome in this group, especially because we will not be centering traumatic experiences. Think of a garden whose land has been impacted by invasive species or whose soil is toxic - it is equally important, if not more so, to add to the soil, to add native plants and beneficial insects, to cut back other plants to allow more light in. In this same way we will be building skills, and adding resources, especially through practical, sustainable self-care practices to nourish ourselves, body, mind and spirit, thereby minimizing the impact of trauma.
I also ascribe to Diane Fosha's belief that trauma stems from "unwanted and unwilled overwhelming emotions in the face of helplessness or aloneness". Processing these experiences and their accompanying emotions in supportive relationships is the way to resolve trauma.
I believe all of our bodies hold trauma. I facilitate spaces that are designed to build participants inner-resources such as emotional-containment, inner peace and clarity. Through 1-on-1 sessions I will help participants process what comes up through our group work.
What if I hate groups?
No problem, lots of people dislike groups. I have worked to develop awareness and skills to help individuals stay connected to themselves while in a group. Our virtual setting also enables women to maintain their personal space.
Where did the idea of Sexual Memoir come from?
Becoming a mother catalyzed a psychospiritual sexual awakening that pushed me to delve into understanding my relationship to my sexuality.
Early in this journey, several authors (A'magine Nation, Claudia Black, Stephanie Covington) instructed their readers to "write their sexual story", which was impossible for me.
Years into participating in women's circles and training as a clinical mental health counselor, I came to understand that I could not have "written" my story on my own - both because I could only access the truth of my own experience through witnessing other women stand in their own truth, and because I needed relationships with real women to help me emotionally process my experiences.
The idea to facilitate women's groups exploring sexual memoir came to me while I was folding laundry in January, 2023 as I was listening to Robin Rinaldi's book, "The Wild Oats Project", and wishing my friends would write their own books.
